Killashee Hotel offers dreamy rooms, fine dining and a divine spa

Is it possible to survive on no sleep or should I just accept the fact that I will soon morph into a walking milk-dispensing corpse?

If you don’t already know, and if you don’t, you must be in the minority — I am pregnant with twins. Above is the constant and steady stream of my subconscious. I have hit the six-month mark, and my brain is abuzz with a flurry of new and possibly needless information that comes with being a first-time parent.

So all of that is to say, I need to hit the off button. And what better way to do that than a luxurious babymoon escape?

Myself and my partner, Sean, booked ourselves into the idyllic Killashee Hotel — one of those dreamy destinations that is just 30 minutes from Dublin.

Sitting on 55 acres of woodlands and gardens, the hotel’s beautiful turrets reveal themselves like a jewel, as we drive past the beautifully manicured lawns. The four-star retreat has had the boujiest of makeovers, and I feel like I’m stepping into a boutique hotel when we take the winding corridor to our room.

I won’t lie, I scream when we open the door. There’s a jacuzzi bath, a sumptuous sofa and a bed resplendent with the softest throw cushions — and it’s still big enough to house me and my snake-like pregnancy pillow, whilst still giving Sean ample space to starfish on his designated side.

When I’m not eating or hitting the spa, I intend to sleep. There’s even a Dyson hairdryer to play with, a Nespresso coffee machine, and a 43-inch smart flat-screen television with Netflix on tap. And don’t even get me started on the Elemis toiletries — obsessed.

But first, lunch. We try the Oak & Anvil, which features a dining area with banquette seating and a cocktail bar — think The Great Gatsby.

I’m in that weird phase where I am juggling food aversions, so all I want today is a tasty ham and cheese toastie. It’s not on the menu, but the chef comes up trumps and makes it for me anyway.

It can only be described as a gift from the gods, the perfect amounts of melted cheese and juicy ham — I spend the next four days telling people about the best sandwich I have ever tasted.

I’m wiping the crumbs off my lips when I head to the award-winning spa and leisure area. It’s also had a makeover, with fresh new-look treatment rooms, juice room and relaxation suite. Donning a robe and slippers, I prepare myself for the Basq Pregnancy Treatment, while Sean hangs out in the hydrotherapy pool.

I am going to be honest and say that not all pregnancy treatments are created equal — but sweet lord, I melt into the bed as soon as my therapist lays hands on me.

An hour of bliss ensues, as I lie on my side and the tension in my legs, back and neck is unfurled.

The customised massage works by releasing tension and reducing fatigue and swelling. There’s just the right amount of pressure, and I’m on my way for a snooze before I know it.

You can also go for the Basq Tired Legs Soother — an exfoliating lower leg and foot massage that improves circulation and heaviness in the legs. Divine. I retreat to the relaxation room until Sean finds me panned out in the dark on a pillowed bed.

It takes all of my willpower to emerge from our sanctuary in time for our booking at The Pippin Tree, which overlooks the stunning gardens.

Giving me all those Parisian vibes, it has been restyled with contemporary furniture and soft delicate hues of rose. Executive Head Chef Phillip Gleeson has designed an elevated culinary experience for the restaurant, featuring the very best local and seasonal produce, impeccably prepared by the team.

We opt for soup to start and are immediately bowled over by the bread basket — don’t scoff, a bread basket has been known to make or break a dinner.

The carby goodness is deliciously warm and there are too many options to choose from. I go for the pan-fried seabass for dinner, and Sean opts for the sirloin steak. It’s fine dining without the fuss or stuffiness, at its best. I just about save room for the blueberry and lemon cheesecake. Superb.

When we walk back to the room, we spot a children’s play room, and we vow to visit again when our two messers get here.

FACTFILE:

KILLASHEE, CO KILDARE See killasheehotel.com ■ Killashee Hotel is close to national visitor attractions including Russborough House, the Irish National Stud and Japanese Gardens, Newbridge Silverware and Kildare Village. ■ An overnight family package for two adults and up to three children starts from €340. ■ BASQ In The Moment Pregnancy Massage costs €105 for 60 minutes.