Dear Maura: My jobless daughter and her husband treat our house like hotel
“They’ve taken us totally for granted. We’re feeding them and paying extra bills now they are with us”
Adult children often maintain their childlike expectation of parents being their to cater for their needs. Picture posed
Dear Maura:
Our daughter and her husband lost their jobs and we let them move in with us. This was to be a short-term solution. They’ve no children, luckily. Anyway, it’s a total disaster.
They’ve taken us totally for granted. We’re feeding them and paying extra bills now they are with us. No jobs yet but they’re looking, as they remind us.
I’ve tried to talk to her and while she’s not ungrateful, there’s no acknowledgement of what we’ve done.
How do we resolve this without a row?
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Answer: So many families find themselves in this situation and it’s never an easy one to negotiate.
It’s not too late to discuss ground rules. There’s tension in the house and that’s not good for any of you.
You and your husband need to have a talk with them. I gather they’re not pulling their weight and that is something they could do, like helping out with jobs around the house. They must have financial worries but you are just looking for some practical support from them.
Remember, this is no picnic for them either. Self-esteem and morale are low. It’s time to talk!
Email your problems to: Maura O’Neill maura.oneill@sundayworld.com
All pictures are posed by models
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