Dear Angela: I enjoy masturbation — but my friends think I need a man
"They find the whole masturbation thing weird; most of the girls claim they don’t do it at all, and only one admitted she does it the odd time”
Dear Angela:
Although I (31) haven’t slept with a man since March, I can honestly say that I have a happy sex life. I masturbate once or twice a week; it’s usually well-planned and I always have a good time.
Sometimes I have a romantic bubble bath by candlelight and with a waterproof vibrator for company. Or I touch myself while watching a romantic movie.
When I’m in a more adventurous mood I masturbate in my car or under a blanket on my balcony. I’m happy with the way things are, but my friends think I’m crazy.
They can’t understand why I would rather have fun by myself than mess around with guys I don’t really fancy. They find the whole masturbation thing weird; most of the girls claim they don’t do it at all, and only one admitted she does it the odd time.
They even felt uncomfortable talking about it. Is what I’m doing really that strange?
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Answer:No. Most girls masturbate at least the odd time, usually in their own home, but it happens in other places as well. For example, one out of 10 women has done it in a car.
But masturbation is still one of those things that even the closest friends usually don’t talk about in detail.
You are more open than the average girl, and that’s fine.
Forgiving and forgetting can be difficult
Should I give in and sleep with him?
Dear Angela:A couple of years ago my husband (53) cheated on me. It was only a one-night stand and I (44) decided to forgive him. But I never had sex with him again.
At first I was too angry to even want sex, and then later on I kept refusing sex because I wanted to punish him. And at some stage I just felt that I don’t need sex in my life to be happy, so I moved out of our shared bedroom for good.
That’s when my husband threatened that he’ll look for sex elsewhere if I don’t want him anymore.
But it’s not that I don’t want him; I still love my husband and don’t want to lose him. But at this stage I’m kind of too stubborn to give in and sleep with him again. And I’m hurt that he’s thinking of sleeping with somebody else.
Answer: First of all, you can’t blame your husband for being frustrated and for thinking about finding sex elsewhere. Two years without sex is a long time, and it’s certainly more than enough punishment for a one-night stand.
If you still love your husband, you should truly forgive him and try to get your marital sex life back on track — otherwise you’ll drive your husband into another woman’s arms.
Are all girls smooth?
Query:My fiancée (24) has smooth legs all the time. I always thought she shaves them but I’ve never seen her doing that.
When I asked her about it, she laughed and explained that her legs are naturally smooth. Is that possible?
Answer:No, not all women shave or wax their legs. Some have naturally smooth legs, with fine and almost invisible hair. Have a close look at her legs to check.
He takes too long
Query:When we’re in bed together my new lover (50) wastes a lot of time on foreplay. I(48) hate that. I’m ok with five minutes, but that’s it. How do I bring it up and tell him without hurting his feelings?
Answer:Don’t mess around; just tell your lover how you feel or simply show him, Make a move and take him whenever you feel the time is right. He’ll get the hint, and he won’t mind.
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