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sex talk Ask Dr Angela: I caught my boyfriend cheating, now he claims he's polyamorous


Open-minded and practical, Dr Angela Brokmann has answered the nation's sex problems for 18 years. Here, she answers your dilemmas.

Dear Angela,

I (39) found out that my new partner (47) is seeing other women.

He spends most of his weekends in Cork, allegedly looking after his elderly parents.

But in truth he’s staying with another woman – one of my friends saw them together.

When I confronted my partner he confessed everything.

He also has a girlfriend in Dublin.

He explained that he is polyamorous and that he loves all three of us. I can understand that somebody might love two people, but three?

I asked my partner to dump the other women but he refused. I’m afraid to put him under pressure because I think he’d leave me.

Will my partner ever change his ways and become faithful?

Angela Says:

If your partner claims to be poly then it’s very unlikely he’ll change his ways and become faithful.

‘Poly’ means that you can love more than one partner simultaneously, and that you can have two, three or even more relationships at once.

Talk to your partner to see how he feels and how he sees his and your future.

If he shies away from any kind of commitment and wants to keep seeing other women, it might be best to split up before you get hurt.

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Online Editors