Jeff Brazier can't 'eliminate' pain of losing Jade Goody
Jeff Brazier can't "eliminate" the pain of Jade Goody's death.
The 36-year-old TV presenter - who's the father of Jade's two sons, 12-year-old Bobby and 10-year-old Freddie, from their relationship between 2002 and 2004 - has revealed he's struggled to "manage" the grief of his children ever since her death from cervical cancer in March 2009.
He admitted: "They'll always feel it. It's not something you eliminate, it's something you manage."
Although Jeff generally feels in control of the situation, he confessed his children are liable to lash out at him without any warning.
He told the Daily Mirror newspaper: "Quite a lot of the time I think everything is under control but there are times when their grief kicks in and it's far from Zen.
"It's actually quite bad. There are things being said to me the kids don't mean and things I have to remind myself to not take personally. Sometimes with Bobby I get the very worst comments thrown at me. Things like, 'You're the worst dad in the world'.
"And it can get worse than that. So bad I wouldn't want to mention. But he's my little boy, I love him and I accept he's going to be angry."
However, the 'This Morning' host said he'd rather bare the brunt of Bobby's anger than seeing him lash out at others.
He reflected: "I accept him doing it to me rather than at school or in society when he's older. I'd much rather he'd take it out on me because, in some respects, that's trust, that's love.
"He knows that's the safest place to do it. Do I begrudge him having this anger?
"No I don't. I just understand.
"It's not about what he says, but about how quickly I can help him get to a point where he sort-of gets through the little wave of grief that sometimes washes over him."