Style & ShowbizShowbiz

Caitlyn Jenner contemplated suicide

Caitlyn Jenner contemplated suicide

Caitlyn Jenner contemplated suicide.

The 'I Am Cait' star - who was known as Bruce Jenner before undergoing a gender transition - admits she considered ending her life when photographers snapped her coming out of the doctor's after having an operation on her Adam's apple.

She recalled: "I could not sleep that night. And I'm up at 3 am walking up and down my hallways thinking, 'Damn, all this s**t is going to come out tomorrow and it's going to be horrible.' And I said, 'You know what, easy way, go in the other room, you got a gun, let's just end it right here.'

"That's like, the easy way out. No more pain, no more nothing. I don't have to deal with the tabloids any longer. I don't have to deal with any of this."

However, the 66-year-old television personality now realises it was the "stupidest thing" to even consider.

Speaking on Any Given Wednesday with Bill Simmons, she added: "[It was the] stupidest thing. I thought, 'What a terrible way to end your life's story!' I don't want my story to end that way, on a negative note.

"That was the beginning of me turning my thinking around to say, 'OK, I think I can do this.'"

Meanwhile, Caitlyn previously revealed she planned to transition at 40 but couldn't go through with it.

She explained: "I was sitting there watching TV and they had a gender clinic in Orange County. I was scared to death about going over there, but it was also the first time I could sit down with somebody and talk about all the things that were going on in my head.

"When I left my first therapy session - first of all I survived it - and nobody laughed at me. I felt really good that for the first time I can actually talk to somebody who's intelligent, understands this ... I was 34 and I thought by the time I'm 40 'I'm gonna transition', I just can't take this any longer. I got to about 39 and I just couldn't go any further."