Relationships & SexDr Angela

Mother thinks dating younger guy is cool

Mother thinks toy boy is cool (Picture posed by models)
Mother thinks toy boy is cool (Picture posed by models)

Dear Angela

My mother is going out with a guy who’s much younger than her. She thinks that’s totally cool but I think my mum is making a fool of herself. Why can’t she be normal and go out with guys her own age?

The guy doesn’t even have his own house, he lives with his parents. My mum says that doesn’t matter, she says she loves him and he makes her happy, and that’s it. She must be nuts, this guy is only a toyboy. I want her to stop seeing him.

ANGELA SAYS: I understand what you mean. But while you might think that your mother is old, she’s actually still young. Nowadays it’s pretty normal for women to go out with men who are younger than themselves.

Talk to your mum about your concerns, but don’t spoil her happiness. Try to accept her boyfriend.


Girlfriend wants me to get pierced in privates

Dear Angela

My girlfriend (27) is big into piercing; she’s pierced from top to toe, nose, lips, nipples, belly button, labia. She’s pierced all over. I’m not mad about it but I don’t mind either. The problem is that she wants me to get pierced as well. She keeps talking about a scrotum piercing - she wants me to wear a big ring on my scrotum, she thinks it would be sexy.

I don’t mind my girlfriend’s piercings but I don’t want to get pierced myself. And I definitely don’t want to wear a ring on my balls.

I would do it just to please my girlfriend, but only if it’s safe and not too painful.

ANGELA SAYS: When you get a piercing, whether it’s your nose, your belly button or your scrotum, you always risk-side effects from discomfort and pain to infection and scarring.

If you’d like to get pierced anyway, don’t start with your scrotum – get a less vulnerable part of your body pierced first to see how your body reacts to it, and to get an idea about the aches and pains involved.

Be careful with wearing scrotum rings, especially if your girlfriend is wearing intimate piercings and jewellery as well. Just imagine them getting tangled up in the heat of action…


Sex is on (meno)pause

Dear Angela

My wife (46) stopped having her periods 5 months ago. Ever since, she refuses to sleep with me. I miss sex, I don’t understand why we can’t have it anymore.

But what’s worse, my wife is tired and bad humoured all the time, and she can’t sleep at night. Is that normal for a woman who’s going through menopause? Is there a pill that helps with this problem?

ANGELA SAYS: Those symptoms are typical for menopause, but there can be other reasons behind them as well. As a first step, she should visit her GP for a check up. There is a ’pill’.

The symptoms of menopause - sleeplessness, hot flashes, depression, osteoporosis, pain during intercourse and sexual disinterest - can be relieved by hormone treatment. But this isn’t suitable for all, so she needs to discuss it with her GP or gynaecologist.