Relationships & SexDr Angela

Are three positions enough for loving?

'Are my sex positions enough?'
'Are my sex positions enough?'

Dear Angela

In a couple of weeks I (25) am going to meet a girl I’ve been chatting with on the internet since last summer. We’re going to spend a week in Spain. I’m looking forward to it, but I’m nervous.

In our chats, I’ve bragged a bit about my experience and all the positions I’m an expert at. B

ut to be honest, I only know kinky positions from watching porn. How many positions do I have to go through when I first sleep with this girl? Would three to four be enough to impress her, or do you think she’ll expect me to change positions more often than that?

ANGELA SAYS: If you try new positions, there’s always a good chance that things won’t run smoothly. Every change of position disrupts a woman’s arousal level, and some women find it difficult to climax if you change positions all the time.

It’s unlikely that she expects advanced sex positions on your first night together, so unless she tells you otherwise, don’t try to impress her with sex acrobatics. Concentrate on the old basics that you feel comfortable with.

Change position once or twice to let her see there’s more in store for her. Wait a night or two before you proceed to more advanced techniques. By then you’ll know her a bit better, and it won’t be such a big deal anymore if a position doesn’t work out straight away.


Hubby’s ‘no’ to blow

Dear Angela

My husband (30) and I (27) have been married for two years and he still won’t let me give him oral sex.

The couple of times I tried to go down on him he pulled away with some lame excuse. I don’t understand what’s wrong with him, I thought all men are mad about oral sex.

ANGELA SAYS: Most men love oral sex, but some guys are too shy to try it. Others are worried about hygiene, and some have had bad experiences or believe that women can’t find pleasure in giving oral sex. Assure your husband that you’re not just trying to please him, but that you’d really like to spoil him orally.

To help him overcome any inhibitions he might have, share a shower with him beforehand to playfully soap off his genitals. If he’s still reluctant, put a condom on him, preferably a flavoured one.


Am I boring in bed for wife?

Dear Angela

My wife and I have been married for 24 years and I thought we still had a good sex life. The other night we were making love and in the middle of it she got panicky and said she just remembered that she forgot to pay the phone bill. How can she think of unpaid bills while we’re making love? I thought she still likes sex as much as I do, but now I’m not so sure.

ANGELA SAYS: One out of ten Irish women thinks about household issues during sex – unwashed dishes, ironing, unpaid bills – anything can pop into a woman’s mind. To keep her mind off un-erotic thoughts, help her to relax and get into the mood. Be attentive and romantic, give compliments. Give her an erotic massage, whisper endearments – it will all help to keep her mind on lovemaking instead of letting it slip to household tasks.